Some Thoughts

With my relatively inexperienced heart, I am fortunate enough to be given situations that make me grow emotionally.  The details of which I cannot disclose, but the things I've learned from it may be of help to some.  Just maybe, so here goes..

Emotional security.  It used to be that one thing I've wanted, for selfish reasons.  You see, in a world of uncertainty, of breaking trusts, of temptations, of lies, I cannot help but desire for something that I can call 'mine'.  I even told my closest friends in college that it may be 25% of what I would want my future life partner to give me.  I can be a bit insecure when it comes to that.  I've always needed assurance from the people that matter in my life - family members or friends.  I need to know that they will always be there for me through the good and the bad times, as I would for them.  I think that's also the very reason why we want to be committed to someone.  We need labels because we want exclusivity.  We call it emotional security, but it's really just our selfish, childish desire to feel safe, and wanted.

Emotional maturity.  It's when I know I cannot have a security blanket all the time.  It's understanding that people are different, and the same person can be different at different times as well.  It is recognizing the fact that getting hurt is always an option in my everyday dealing with people, most especially with the more important ones.  It is moving on, and letting go.  It is looking at the bigger picture and not zooming in on my heart alone.  It is difficult.  It is growing up.  It is knowing when to risk and knowing when to stop.  It is also knowing what is yours and how much needs to be invested.  It is realizing that I cannot always be happy.